Saturday, 22 July 2006

Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars

A friend sent me this earlier today and I think it's hilarious!  Before you read, I must stress these are not my personal views.  But I feel what follows may help men and women understand each other a little better.

Woman's English

Yes = No

No = Yes

Maybe = No

I'm sorry = You'll be sorry

We need = I want

It's your desicion = The correct desicion should be obvious by now

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later

We need to talk = I need to complain

Sure... go ahead = I dont want you to.

I'm not upset = Of course im upset, you moron!

Your ... so manly = You need to shave and u sweat a lot

Your certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you think about???

Be romantic, turn the lights off =   I have Flabby thighs

Do you love me?? = I'm going to ask for something expensive

How much do you love me?? = I did sumthing today which ur really not going to like

I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off ur shoes and find a good game on T.V.

Is my butt fat?? = Tell me im beautiful

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me

Are you listening to me?? = Too late your dead


Men's English

I'm hungry = I'm hungry

I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy

I'm tired = I'm tired

Do you want to go to a movie?? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you

Can I take you out to dinner?? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you

Can I call you sometime?? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you

May I have this dance?? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

Nice dress = Nice clevage

You look tense, Let me give you a massage = I want to fondle you

What's wrong?? = I guess sex tonight is out of the question

I'm bored = Do you want to have sex?

I love you = Let's have sex now

I love you too = Okay, I said it.... we'd better have sex now!

Let's talk = I'm trying to impress you by showing you that i am a deep person and then maybe you'ld like to have sex with me

Will you marry me?? = I want to make it illlegal for you to have sex with other guys

I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together =   I am gay.

Thanks to Ally for the above graphic.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

LMAO!!

It's funny 'cos it's true!!! LOL!

Great entry mate!

Ste
x

Anonymous said...

that's a good one !!  Linda in WA  

Anonymous said...

Oh Leigh REALLY  lol ........Jan xx

Anonymous said...

LOL Leigh ~ Yes very true ~ Ally

Anonymous said...

I enjoyed reading your journal and will return.  As far as this entry goes,  love makes the world go around.   You have to wonder how we all get along.            Dawn

Anonymous said...

hi Leigh...

lol....aint that the truth, sounds about right!

Astra!
http://journals.aol.co.uk/astra1547/astrasjournal

Anonymous said...

We don't have communication problems like that in my house. We don't talk. ;O)
B.

Anonymous said...

Lol, enjoyed those.  Thanks for your comment.  However, if I were going to somewhere like Lanzarote I do not think I would miss my computer lol.  Think of all the things you will have to write about when you get back.  

Anonymous said...

That was sooo funny, lol...glad you have broadband sorted, mine isn't yet, think they have given up.
Well done on your journal, refreshing to have young views...have you read Stev Twains blog, he is funny! but also very caring. Hot here in North Wales, are you going to the Royal Welsh?
Rach.xx

Anonymous said...

Leigh, all the stuff about women is written by MCPs, but all the stuff about men is 100% spot on.  Learn it by heart  :O)